Part of this human experience is to live in the world, and in this world we get hurt. Often this hurt stems from something another person does--an unkind word, a lie, a betrayal, etc. Conflict arises when we take offense to these hurts, but does it have to? Can we avoid this conflict? I believe we can. Avoiding conflict is as simple as being mindful of your focus. All you need to remember is that it isn't about you!
This point was made abundantly clear while listening to Jennifer McLean's Body Dialoging session from Sept. 11th on her Masterworks Healing membership site. (http://www.masterworkshealing.com/) It began with a prayer for the 9/11 disaster and what this ordeal taught us on a global level and continued on to show what we can learn from individual conflict. People who commit painful actions are acting from a need within themselves which cries out for acknowledgement. Your victimhood lies in the fact you were around when that pain was expressed! Instead of automatically assuming the expression of pain was to hurt you, you are free to see the pain for what it is: their pain! It isn't about you! When you see their pain for what it is, it ceases to hurt you! Acknowledge that part of their human experience and remember that underneath the pain is a being of love and light.
As we learn to interact and cope in the world, it is easy to get hurt by the things others do. Just remember: their actions are only a reflection of how they have learned to cope in the world. Acknowledge their pain, but go beyond the tension to see the light within. The road to peace and understanding shows up when your focus is on others. It isn't about you!